Snow has started melting, as the rains have begun to pound. Though the temperatures still swing in violent tantrums along the scales, there is the general feeling of warmth in the air. As if believing it is enough to will it into existence. In the meantime, I retreat to the comfort of an old tv show or book, and a cup of tea.
Maybe one day soon, I will be able to put my Winter boots into their annual slumber.
Returning home on the bus with my baby girl in my lap, holding her close because she’d been complaining of a tummy ache, I wished the driver could go faster. I feared what was about to happen on the crowded, rush hour ride. And sure enough, within seconds it went flying. Vomit. Vomit went flying from my little girl into my face, my hair, and all down both of our coats, scarves, and pants. By that point I had resigned myself, and while no one said anything, I knew this is not what they wanted after a long day at work. But when my girl started crying, not because she felt sick or because she vomited, but because she got ‘you all dirty’ I said screw it.
Nothing I could do for the other people. They were adults and just had to understand that sometimes crap *or vomit* like this happens, especially to little toddlers. I could, however, do something for the little girl crying in my arms upset that she got me dirty. I soothed that little girl telling her it didn’t matter, and sat there holding her covered in puke for the next ten minutes – until we got to our stop. No one offered a word of encouragement, or a friendly look of sympathy. It was a very looooong ten minutes.
Until it came to my stop, and a lady who was sitting at the far back came forward, and as she past us, she didn’t cringe or give a dirty look like I had done this on purpose *’cause yeah, I torture my child just to screw up your day* but instead she cried, “Oh no! Can I help you????” She was getting off at the same stop as I, and as the bus slowed, stopped, opened and we exited, she kept offering her assistance. Asking if there’s anything she can do to help us home. We were all right – I just had to carry her to the house and then get her cleaned off – but this lady with her sincere help and understanding gave me the support and strength I needed at exactly the right time.
Thank you. Thank you to this lady. I don’t know your name, and I didn’t catch it as I was wrapped up in my girl, but thank you. You really helped give one mama a little camaraderie right when she needed it.
We all know we live in a consumer society. When we need something we go to the shop. So while out doing the groceries, Baby Girl turned to me and asked, “Mama, where you go buy me?”
I answered, “To the best store ever.”
I patted myself on the back for that quick thinking.
After bath time, I’m trying to get pajamas onto a little girl who’s more interested in talking and wriggling.
Suddenly, she runs over to the pregnancy photo hanging in the room.
“That my Daddy. That Drake. That my mommy. That me in Mommy’s belly.”
And without out missing a beat she tilts her head towards me, “Mama, why you eat me?”
I had no answer.
It’s freezing. I’m saying -30 degrees celsius all week. That makes it terrifyingly cold and hard to take outfit shots. It becomes a game to see what will freeze first – me or my camera. So I curled up in bed to read my Firefly Celebration Book. Nothing left to do but spend the day in bed with some of my favorite men…. Nathan Fillion, Alan Tudyk, Joss Whedon, and of course Drake the Dog.
It’s a hard knock life.
The Labodorite Pendant from SNS Jewelry Studio has this amazing ability to change color depending on what I wear. Here it’s a crisp, almost grayish, blue, but against my teal shirt at home it has a decided green look to it. It’s as variable as the weather, and as varied as it’s owner in temperament. Yes, we too shall get on just wonderfully, I think.
It’s interesting to hear how others sometimes see you. It’s also interesting to hear the varied accounts of the same. “Sweet, kind, intelligent” have been used, as have “unguarded and open.” But just as rightfully, one could use acerbic and withdrawn, as every bright side of the moon has it’s dark. Sometimes I wish I had the ability to play the political/social game better. But for better or for worse, I seem incapable of the kind of gentle sway and sweet ingratiating that comes so naturally to others.
I often feel like this pendent – changeable and malleable depending on internal and external forces alike. And helpless to conceal it.
*linking up with WIWW and Style Sessions*
Ever seen that movie Sophie’s Choice with Meryl Streep? So she’s in a concentration camp and a Nazi makes her chose between her two children – which one lives and which one dies. She gets to keep one. The rest of the movie revolves around this choice. It’s heart wrenching…and I’m going to make a joke involving it.
I say, ” We’re going to Gramma and Grandpas.”
Baby Girl says, “I wanna take my babies.”
I reply, “Nope, you can only take one.”
Sophie’s Choice for toddlers.
Just as dramatic… to a three year old.
The link up was a bit of a failure. I think that means you guys just want some inspiration. Which is totally cool with me! So I’m going to continue breaking fashion rules, and if you’d like to join me leave your link in the comments and I’ll be sure to check them out. ‘Cause I love seeing what you do too.
Next week I’m breaking a rule from the 50’s that said you should never wear high heels with cropped pants. Apparently the connotation was that you were more than a bit promiscuous. So I’m breakin’ that rule next week before it gets too cold to do so.