|Scarf – street stand; Top&Tights – F21; Dress – Ruche; Shoes – Payless.|
As my birthday nears *oh dear Lord, I’m getting old!* I find myself thinking back to high school. Don’t ask me why because I have no idea, but that’s what’s on my mind these days. I think it might be because as teenagers we feel like we’ll be young and full of potential and capability forever. Or it might be because I had such a clear and vivid picture of what my life would be like when I reached the age I’m reaching. But either way I find myself being nostalgic and retrospective.
I think back to the girl I was. I felt so out of place, so awkward, so nerdy, and so un-cool. I don’t know if that’s the truth, but that’s how I remember it. If you look through the yearbook you might find a picture of someone who was…what? Bold? Daring? Confident? What did others think? I wonder how they remember it. It’s interesting how our memories differ based on our perspectives. Over the years, I’ve run into friends and people I knew back then and realized that what they remember is different from what I remember. So I wonder who the keeper of truth is? Is there an absolute truth out there or is it all malleable based on our thoughts? Is it like time: based on your position and speed in relation to the universe?
JennDecember 20, 2011
Your post reminds me of a verse from a poem/song:
"they echo names you long forgot, they echo days you wished you had again … they echo minutes that lasted hours that were gone in seconds"
And I think high school was such a fleeting experience compared to the rest of my life so far. I often wonder about how much I've grown since high school and whether or not people would be able to recognize me. I always have difficulty reconciling this idea that I'm the same person but different. Great post, btw!
JoannaDecember 20, 2011
Thanks so much for your thoughtful comment, Jenn. I agree with you about how it seems like such a short amount of time compared to the rest of your life, but it's always amazing how at the time it feels like so long, and how formative those years are.
Tracy @ The Wardrobe WandererDecember 24, 2011
School was never easy for me – I felt like such a nerd, and always thought that the "cool kids" looked down on me and then I could never overcome the stigma of being the "shy, awkward one." Since connecting with some of the ppl I grew up with through facebook, though, I've been surprised at how differently some of them saw things. They thought things (good things) about me that I would never have guessed! It IS a very formative time; it's too bad that so often our perceptions of ourselves and how others see us is so off during that time.
So, what reunion is coming up for you? 5 yr., 10 yr? 😉 I'm past my 20 year (it was about a year and a half ago, and I didn't make it.) I think that I'll go if they do a 25 year one, though. 🙂
JoannaDecember 25, 2011
Oh I don't have a reunion coming up. I'm just feeling like one because I'm turning a certain milestone soon. 😉