Feelings are not reality. Let me explain.

They feel real and they are. They are a real and valid reflection of what your state of mind/emotion is. BUT they are not necessarily a true reflection of what the situation is. Feelings are valid, but their perception of reality is not necessarily so. You may be offended, without any actual offense / wrong taking place, for example. You may be hurt without any hurt actually occurring. So while your feelings are valid, your interpretation of events may not. That’s where other people and a good therapist come in: they challenge that view and show you where your feelings may be leading you astray.

Another important thing that comes off of that is the need to control and regulate your emotions. Because they may not necessarily be a true measure of reality, we as humans bear the responsibility of regulating our emotions in order to come to a truer and better understanding of reality. And to then act accordingly. Because if you feel hugely offended, where no actual offense was given, and you let that take control of you, your actions will not be in any way in accordance with reality. And you’ll be hurtful, overreactive, and frankly isolated….as who wants to be around that. It’s a little like if everyone is telling you you’re drunk, maybe you should sit down: if everyone is telling you your feelings are not based in real events, maybe you need to reevaluate events.